Supporting Your Child's Transition to Secondary School: A Summer Guide

The transition to secondary school is one of the most important milestones in a child’s education journey. For many children, it brings a mix of excitement, curiosity, and anxiety. As a parent or carer, it can be difficult to know how best to support them emotionally and practically.

At Your Space Foundation, we specialise in child counselling and mental health support for children and young people. We understand how these moments of change can shape a young person’s confidence and wellbeing. In this guide, we’ll share practical, compassionate advice to help your child feel more prepared as they get ready for starting secondary school.

Why secondary school transition can be a challenge

Moving on from primary school often means leaving behind a setting that’s familiar and comfortable. Children go from having one main teacher and a small group of classmates to navigating multiple teachers, new subjects, and a much larger building. They may be expected to remember timetables, follow stricter routines, and manage new responsibilities.

It can take time to adjust to being around older pupils and forming new friendships in an unfamiliar setting. For children who are more anxious, sensitive or unsure of themselves, these changes may feel especially difficult. Even those who appear confident can feel unsettled beneath the surface.

Understanding what makes this change difficult helps you offer the support they need during the school transition period.

Common worries children have about starting secondary school

Children vary in how they express their thoughts and feelings, but many have similar concerns when it comes to starting secondary school. These can include:

Getting lost in the building - A larger site with multiple classrooms and corridors can feel confusing at first. Some children worry about being late because they can’t find where they need to be.

Worries about making friends - Children often wonder whether they will find people they connect with. If they are not moving up with a close group of friends, this uncertainty can feel even more intense.

Keeping up with school work - Timetables, homework, remembering equipment, and managing their own schedule can feel like a lot to handle all at once.

Making new friends - Peer groups become more complex in adolescence. Concerns about clothing, appearance and acceptance can start to influence how young people see themselves.

Travelling to and from school - Taking on a new route, particularly alone, can be daunting. Children might feel nervous about public transport, walking further distances, or arriving on time.

Bringing these concerns into conversation in a calm and open way can help reduce some of the pressure. Children benefit from being heard and supported rather than reassured too quickly or told everything will be fine.

Ways to support your child over the summer

1. Talk in small, regular moments

Rather than planning a big conversation, it can help to talk casually and regularly about what’s ahead. You might start a conversation while making lunch, driving somewhere, or winding down at bedtime.

Questions like “What are you most curious about?” or “Is there anything you’re feeling unsure about?” can invite discussion without putting them on the spot. Some children need time to warm up to these conversations, so keeping things relaxed and unpressured is often more effective.

2. Familiarise them with the school again

If your child had a transition day, try revisiting what they remember. You could look at photos or videos on the school’s website together. If you live nearby, walking or driving past the school can help it feel more familiar and less intimidating.

You might talk about what the school day will look like, what the uniform will be like, or how they’ll know where to go. These small points of reference can help your child feel more grounded.

3. Practise the school journey together

Doing the route to school together in August can ease nerves. It gives your child a clearer idea of what to expect and helps build confidence in navigating the journey.

Try the journey at the time they’ll normally travel so they can see how busy the roads, buses or footpaths are. Talk about what they might do if there’s a delay or if something doesn’t go to plan.

4. Help them feel involved and prepared

Involving your child in preparing for the new school year can help them feel more in control. Whether it's choosing stationery, trying on the uniform, or organising a school bag together, these tasks are a chance to build readiness at their pace.

Encouraging them to set reminders, look at a sample timetable, or lay out their school things can also help reduce last-minute stress.

5. Talk openly about friendships and changes

It’s natural for friendship dynamics to shift during this stage. Some children will stay close with friends from primary school, while others may drift apart and meet new peers.

Let your child know that friendships often take time to develop and that it’s okay to feel unsure at first. If possible, help them reconnect with someone they already know who is going to the same school or encourage opportunities to meet others through summer activities.

6. Focus on what they can do when challenges come up

Rather than trying to eliminate all worries, help your child think through what they might do in different situations. This could include who to ask for help, what to do if they forget something, or where to go if they feel unsure at break time.

These conversations help children feel better equipped to handle problems as they arise. The aim is not to make everything perfect, but to help them trust that they can find a way through.

7. Recognise how your child shows their feelings

Not all children will talk openly about how they feel. Some may become more irritable, clingy or withdrawn when they are worried. Others might seem fine on the surface but express their emotions through sleep changes or physical symptoms like headaches.

Keep checking in gently. Let your child know that it’s okay to have mixed feelings and that they don’t have to figure everything out straight away.

When to consider child counselling

If your child’s anxiety about starting secondary school is ongoing or affecting their sleep, mood, or daily life, it may be time to seek additional support. Some children benefit from talking to a professional who understands how to work with young people during times of change.

At Your Space Foundation, our counsellors are trained in child and adolescent mental health. We offer a safe, supportive space where children can explore their thoughts and feelings and build the confidence they need to approach secondary school with more ease.

Final thoughts on supporting secondary school transition

Transition to secondary school is about more than uniforms and new classrooms. It’s an emotional journey that can influence how children feel about themselves and their learning. As a parent or carer, your calm presence, encouragement and practical support can make all the difference.

If you’re concerned about how your child is coping, or if you’d like guidance on how to support them through this stage, our team is here to help.

📞 Contact us today to find out more

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